Wild Child
by BrieDagger
Summary: In this story you follow two siblings, Brie and Crystal, who are struggling to survive an apocalypse. You see them fall apart and you see them bind together. The real question is, who survives? Primarily OC with characters from the show also. Daryl/OC
1. Chapter 1: The Beginning

The world is on fire, the people are screaming. I open my eyes to a new world. I look at my walls to see them alight with an fiery orange. I get out of my bed to look out my window. I see the neighbor across the street, their house ablaze. People are running in the streets, their screams echoing throughout the resilient town.

"What the fuck is going on?" I ask no one at all. Everyone is too busy screaming to actually pay attention to the confused girl in the window. I put my hand up against the glass when I see it. Zombies, every where. Those weren't people running, they were zombies chasing.

I try to force air out of my lungs. This isn't real, this isn't real. But the longer I stood there, the more it felt real. I whirl around to the sound of an window breaking. I dart to my door, locking it and shoving my computer chair under the knob. I take slow steps away from the door as I hear a gurgling noise followed by rough breathing.

This is it, this is how it ends.

But if that was true, then this story would suck pretty badly wouldn't it?

I grab my back pack, dumping all of its contents. Folders, calculators, pencils, they're all strewn across my bed. I pause for a moment before grabbing a piece of paper and scribbling four fateful words on it.

THE DEAD HAVE RISED.

My scrawly handwriting reads. I take it to the wall and continue my search for my water bottle. I run to my bathroom, filling it to the top. I shove the water bottle into the bag. I find small snacks throughout my room, Cheez-its, pringles, an apple that's turning brown, but it'll do. I grab a few packs of gum and shove them into the sack. I grab a small first aid kit, plenty of clothes. I change quickly into ripped shorts and a tank top, putting on a black and white cardigan over it. I switch out my fuzzy cat slippers for my biker boots.

It took me a while to realize the screaming was coming from my house. I shoot a tear-filled look towards my door, the door that has a CM Punk poster taped to it hastily. The screaming doesn't stop for a few minutes.

I close my eyes and listen.

So that's what death sounds like.

I hurry to my window, throwing it open, I note there aren't any zombies on our lawn. I glance over to see my sister's balcony. I'm weighing the options, do I make the dive and possibly die? Or do I just drop down and leave her to her fate?

I don't have time to weigh the options because I'm diving. My hand grabs another hand when I realize I've missed the ledge. Someone's pulling me up over the ledge. I look into the glistening blue eyes of my older sister, Crystal.

She's shaking so badly, she's holding a small blanket to her chest. Crystal had this blanket since she was born, holding it in her small knuckles. She accordingly named it 'her blankie'. Sure I thought it was a rag, but if it kept her from falling apart, hell, she can keep it.

"Brie. What's going on?" She asks, her voice barely above a whisper. Her hair is shoulder length and her small frame seems to be breaking. She's wearing a white cardigan, a floral shirt, and a blue skirt.

I look out in the streets to see zombies, "Our worst nightmares, they're alive." I whisper back, "Did you pack?" I nod towards her backpack on her shoulder.

She nods, swallowing hard, "I grabbed all the food and water I could. I found some knives, pocket knives primarily. Also pepper spray, but that probably won't kill the.." Her voice breaks then, "Zombies." She finally manages to get out.

I pull out a handgun out of my boot, "This was in my room. I must have stashed it in the closet for protection a while back." I load the handgun, clicking off the safety. I eye the old charger in our driveway, "We should make a run for the car."

"You won't leave me, will you?" Crystal whispers, her eyes teary. She's never looked more terrified then she did in that moment. That frail look in her eyes, she honestly thought she was going to die.

"Of course not." I shake my head, because the idea is so insane my mind can't form around it.

"What about Mom and Dad? What about Jed?" Crystal asks, looking down the street at our half brother's house.

I shake my head again, though it's not because the idea is insane, "We can't."

I don't have the heart to tell her the screams were coming from our house. I can't do that to her. She's so close to falling apart already, I can't let her shatter just yet. I would move the sun and stars for her. But I couldn't make the monsters banging on our doors disappear.

"We have to save ourselves, okay? For them. We have to live for them. They'd want us to survive this." I try to rationalize the idea, but the idea just sounds so inhumane, I feel sick.

I don't even believe myself, I don't know how I got her to nod her head.

"We'll have to jump. I have the keys in my pocket. When you hit the ground, run for the car, be aware." I turn towards the ledge, "I'll go first." I breathe, "So if something is down there, I can get rid of it."

Crystal seems unsure, but she steps a few feet back and shuts the doors to her balcony. "Okay." She says softly.

I take a deep breath, then I throw myself over the ledge. I hit the ground rolling. I barely manage to push myself up, my muscles screaming at me. I make it to the car, opening the drivers side and flinging myself in.

I see Crystal drop the the ground, she manages to land on her feet. She darts for the car, I reach over and open the passenger side. She hops in and I'm already pulling out of the driveway.

"What kind of God does this?" She suddenly whispers, turning to me with tears in her eyes. "No one deserves this."

I peel down the street, pondering her statement. Finally I decide, no God of mine.

* * *

We stop at a gas station, I quickly fill up the tank. I decide to go into the station and search for supplies. Crystal is busying herself in the car with an old newspaper we found on the side of the road.

I enter, it's quiet, too quiet. The lack of life in here is astonishing. I finger the knife in my belt, pulling it out. I find beef jerky, cans of gas, and matches. Right as I'm about to leave, I feel a hand pull me back.

I turn around, stabbing a knife into the skull of a zombie. My first zombie kill, completed. The disgusting gurgling creature drops to the ground. Making one final nasty sound before dropping.

I breathe, because if I don't, I'll pass out. I just killed someone. I had just stabbed someone that had used to be a person. The idea is so overwhelming. This person used to be a son, an brother, maybe a father.

"I'm so sorry." I almost sob, I turn on my heel and head back to the car. It was survival of the fittest now.

"Find anything good?" Crystal asks, not looking up from her crossword.

I hold up the cans of gas, "Gas, jerky, matches. Simple stuff, nothing extravagant. The place has been looted a few times. Everyone just left behind the crappy stuff for us."

"Apocalypse comes and people are still being dicks." Crystal mutters as she fills in one of the rows. "I fucking hate crosswords." She suddenly says.

I climb into the drivers side, Crystal climbs into the passenger seat. "Then why do you do them?"

"To feel normal." Crystal bites the end of the pen, "This apocalypse shit makes me feel like I'm just living an incredibly long nightmare."

I nod, "I can agree with that."

"You've been pretty.. weird about this whole.. apocalypse thing." Crystal turns to eye me suspiciously. "Are you okay, Brie?" She asks softly.

I swallow hard, "I'm fine. I just, I'm so fucking worried all the time. What if this is it Crystal? What if this is just the end for us? No happy ending, no ride off into the sunset, no bathes filled with money? Is this really it for us?"

Crystal stares at me with astonishment as I continue ranting.

"That can't be fair though, can it? Why are we the only generation that gets absolutely nothing? Here's an apocalypse, enjoy slaughtering each other. How is that fair?!" I snap, hitting the steering wheel with a fury. "Why us?!"

Crystal puts her hand on my arm, "Brie come on, it's going to be okay. It'll be over soon." She says reassuringly.

"How can you be so certain? Did you mark the calender? It's been days now, maybe even weeks. The government still hasn't stopped the 'this is not a test' messages. The cities are flooded with those.. things.." I shudder at the thought of them, _"There is no one to help us."_

My loss of hope is so overwhelming I have to breathe.

Instead of letting Crystal try to reassure me again, I start the car and tear out of the gas station.

Hours pass, and the list gets longer. I kill three more walkers as we head North, I don't know where we're going, I just know we have to keep moving. Crystal wants to stop and sleep, but I tell her she'll have enough time to sleep when she's dead.

After I say that, she ignores me for hours and tries to ignore the fact she got stuck with her hopeless little sister for an apocalypse.

Crystal is relatively shielded from the entire apocalypse. Thanks to me, of course. I don't want her to see the horrors that humanity has become. I want to protect her from everything and everyone.

I'm so afraid I'll lose her, it causes a knot in my stomach.

Soon enough, she comes back to life, though she's sleep talking. She's listing names of the friends she had.

"Emeline, Jessica, Lauren..." The names keep going until she starts to get to family. "Dad, Mom..." Her voice breaks a little after she says Mom, and I see tears streaming down her face. "Jed." She hiccups, "Hershel, Beth, Patricia, Otis, Maggie..." The names come faster and faster until she bolts up, awake. "I can't sleep, I have dreams about them, Brie. They won't go away!" She's almost screaming now.

"Crystal!" I pull the car to the side of the road, "Stop!" I shout at her as she tries to yank out her hair.

"I can't do this Brie, I can't do this alone, please don't make me do this." Crystal repeats over and over again. She clamps her hands over her ears, pulling her knees up to her chest, profusely crying.

"Don't make you do what?" I ask her, grabbing her shoulders and shaking her. "Do what?!" I shout louder.

"Don't make me survive an apocalypse. Please don't make me watch people die. Don't, please." She whispers so quietly I barely hear her. She looks up from her knees, tears in her eyes. "I can't."

I sigh sadly, frowning, "Crystal."

"Just, leave me alone." She snaps at me. I realize the sun is coming up, she realizes it too, because she stops and she watches it. The soft orange glow lights up the dark abyss that has become the sky. The stars begin to fade into the soft pale blue as the sun rises. Dew has fallen on the grass, glistening in response to the sun rising.

Crystal opens her car door and starts running.

"No!" I shout, opening my car door and racing after her into the forest.

Damn it, don't make me lose her now.

Please.


	2. Chapter 2: Where Did You Go?

I held my gun out in front of me as I winded hopelessly through the trees. That girl could run, that much as obvious. I just kept thinking, damn it I couldn't protect her. She went crazy. I almost wanted to start screaming her name until my lungs collapsed.

Dashing through the woods, I lost where the car was. I just needed to find her, I couldn't let her die. The trees scratched at me and constantly flung in my way as I raced through the forest. I couldn't find her - what if she died?! What if..

I couldn't afford to think like that.

I was so angry at her and angry at myself, I didn't know that I'd been pacing for the past few minutes. I run a hand through my golden blonde hair. I put my forehead against a tree. I pound my fist against the tree, making low screams as I clutch the broken branches.

I hear a walker behind me. I whirl around and stab it right in the eye without blinking.

"That was pretty badass."

I'm not sure if I'm delusional or not, because that sure sounded like a voice to me. I whirl around to see a rough looking man with a crossbow aimed at me.

I roll my eyes, "Are we really doing this?" I ask, waving my hand at the crossbow.

The man smirks, raising an eyebrow, "Depends on what you think we're doing."

Oh great, so this guy was sexual innuendo happy. Damn it I just needed to find my sister, I don't have time to bullshit around with this guy. I only came looking for my sister, not for someone to repopulate with. Though he wasn't too hard on the eyes.

"I'm just trying to find my sister. She looks like me, though she's taller, has glasses, seen her?" I ask, propping my hand on my hip.

"Trust me, if there was another one of you running around in this forest, I would know." The man says, that hinting smirk still splattered across his lips. He lowers the crossbow, "Daryl Dixon." He puts his hand out. I note that he has a slight redneck accent.

"Brie." I say, "Brie Evans." I shake his hand and quickly retrieve mine, "Nice to meet you, but I have to go find her." I take a few steps back.

"Maybe she found our camp."

I raise an eyebrow at him, my turn to be surprised, "Where is your camp?"

"How do I know you won't loot it?" Daryl suddenly asks me.

"You don't."

Daryl stares at me for a few moments, then he decides to trust me. "I can take you."

Now it was my turn to play the untrustworthy card, "How do I know you won't kill me?"

He smirks, "You don't."

Out of desperation, I went with him. It wasn't because he was super attractive or anything. It was purely just to find my sister, I wasn't going to hang around at this camp. I had to find my sister and scram, I didn't want to hang out in a huge crowd of survivors.

He leads me through the winding woods, I occasionally tripped and managed to pick myself back up. We finally hit a clearing, full of people. People everywhere, a young boy chasing a young girl. All of it seemed so human it almost felt like it was real.

They were deluding themselves with the idea that everything would go back to normal. A group of women were sitting in a sewing circle, occasionally giggling and shoving the other.

"Ey! Rick!" Daryl shouts, heading over to a man in a Sheriff's uniform. One that I recognized oh too well.

"Well I'll be, is that Brie Evans you have with you? Damn, the troublemakers really do survive the apocalypse." Rick Grimes says with a smirk on his lips. "Lucky for you, I'm off duty for a little bit."

I turn a bright red when I realize he recognizes me too, "Still a Sheriff during this entire thing? Thought you'd ought to give it up, it's your opening. Didn't you get the memo? The dead have risen, you can't arrest zombies for eating people."

Rick throws back his head and laughs, "The badge stays on. Lucky for you."

I roll my eyes, "Anyways, I'm looking for my sister, seen her?"

"You mean this chick?" A old man climbs out of an RV, followed by.. Crystal. Oh my god she's alive and I could cry. I run over to her, throwing my arms around her, I'm cursing at her and I'm trying not to beat the hell out of her.

"You stupid bitch how dare you leave me like that. You could have gotten killed. Does it get you off to run off and leave me like that? Terrified and alone? Do you have ANY idea what you've done to me?" I pretty much snarl into her ear as she wraps her arms around me.

"Brie, I'm fine, I'm fine." She repeats, as if that's going to make all this better.

I'm so mad at her but I'm so relieved she's alive. Those glistening blue eyes were still full of life.

"Okay, thank you." I turn to Daryl, grabbing my sister by the wrist, "We'll leave now."

Crystal makes a noise of protest, and I turn to her, "What?" I snap.

"It won't work. Just running all the time. Brie, I'm tired." She moans, "We should stay with them, they're good people. They can come with us back to the charger, we can drive it over here, and share our supplies."

"Good people? You've barely known them for an hour!" My voice is rising and I know everyone can hear me.

Crystal sighs, "Please Brie, for me."

I give in after a few more minutes of begging. Crystal wants this, fine, if she dies because of this, great, maybe she'll have learned her lesson. I lead them back to the charger, Shane and Rick. Two police officers.

"So Brie, what made you decide to join us?" Rick finally asks, "Thought you'd run as fast as you could when you saw me."

"I almost did." I lightly say, "Crystal wants to stay, so I'll stay."

Rick laughs, "So protective of your older sister. Remember when I had to arrest you for nearly killing her ex boyfriend? Come on, what was his name again?"

"Josh." I answer, "I would have killed him if you hadn't peeled me off of him. That was unfair."

"Unfair?! You not murdering a man is unfair?" Rick gives me a little shove, a teasing tone to his voice. "Despite all the times I had to put handcuffs on you, I liked you. Thought you had a little fire in ya."

"A little? Sounds like an inferno to me." Shane says.

* * *

I sit in front of the dwindling campfire as my sister chats away with the ladies of the camp. Lori, was Rick's wife. Though I'm fairly certain she had something going on with Shane, but hey, who was I to say? Carol was married to Ed, who really seemed like a fat bastard to me.

They had lost some people when zombies had attacked their camp, they had decided to move their camp and that's how they found us. Daryl, he had a brother, Merle, but they lost him in Atlanta when T-Dog handcuffed him to a roof.

These people had been through a lot in just a few weeks.

I told them our story and they were all so amazed at how I took an apocalypse so easily. Little did they know about my mental state. Each day I felt like screaming. I was going more insane each day.

Just sitting, just waiting. It was getting on my last nerve. I needed to be doing something, because doing nothing was pushing me off the ledge.

Crystal laughs incredibly loud, and damn her, she seems so happy. She's been happily shielded from the apocalypse due to me. I try to be happy for her, but it's getting harder each day.

Daryl sits down next to me, "It's getting dark, why don't you get some sleep? Those bags aren't going to go away if you just stare at the fire."

"I can't sleep." I say, but what I really want to say is that 'I won't sleep' because it feels impossible. The nightmares will come in packs and I won't be able to function in the morning. The paranoia is so strong it twists my insides.

"That's bullshit."

I turn to eye him, ready to give him the whole 'who do you think you are' speech. But he's not even looking at me, his eyes are glaring into the fire.

"So what if it is." I say under my breath, "I won't sleep."

Daryl turns to set his eyes on me, "You're safe."

I start to laugh so hard my stomach hurts and everyone stares at me. Crystal's blue eyes are wide in shock. She hadn't heard my laugh in forever now, she thought that part of me had died.

"That's a really shitty joke." I shake my head, smiling, looking into the fire.

Daryl smirks, shaking his head, "Girl, you really are losing it."

"Maybe I never had anything in the first place." I shrug and I push myself off the ground. I walk over to Crystal and plop myself down, "So what's up?"

"Just talking about stuff we miss." Crystal supplies with a chipper tone. "I miss my iPod. Oh god it had Celine Dion on it and Katy Perry.. I miss music sooo much."

I roll my eyes, "Okay Katy Perry sucks, first of all." My sister holds a hand to her heart in mock-hurt. "I really miss running water. Seriously, this taking bathes in lakes shit is so annoying. Plus the lack of privacy isn't anything to be happy about."

All of the ladies laugh.

"Oh yeah, you can't even begin to comprehend the number of times I thought I heard someone and just ran for it!" Carol pipes, looking down, shaking her head, a smile on her face.

Crystal beams, "I know, it's just so god awful! I'll just dunk a thing of water over my head and declare that my shower for the day."

She's met with a chorus of 'ew's' and laughter.

"Hey, everyone!" Rick suddenly calls, "Come on, gather up."

Everyone huddles around the fire, eyeing Rick.

"We're leaving for the CDC in the morning. We have to make sure that it's gone. We have other options, not just the outskirts of Atlanta. Plus after losing so many people when those zombies attacked, it's safer if we move." Rick says, propping his hands on his hips, adjusting the tip of his hat.

"Y'all can come with us." Rick suddenly turns to Crystal and I, "If you want of course."

Crystal turns towards me, that pleading look in her eyes.

"Sure." I say.

Rick claps his hands together and smiles, "Good, that's settled. Get as much rest as you can people, we'll be on the road for a few days. So you'll need all of the beauty sleep you can get."

The group disperses, the women excitedly talking about the stuff they may get back. Hot showers, warm beds, solid walls.. the feeling of safety. Though at this point, safety was more of an illusion then it was a reality.


	3. Chapter 3: Lost Hope

Sleeping never seemed to be an option to me. It was an endlessly night of rolling around on the hard ground, watching the flames tire themselves out. My breathing was shallow as I listened to the light buzz of voices around me.

I was restless.

Crystal lay snoring next to me, her long blonde hair growing past her shoulders now. Her glasses were pushed aside and she curled her legs up to her chest. She snuggled easily into the cold night ground.

I, on the other hand, couldn't be more uncomfortable. The ground was cold and wet, pressing into my already sensitive back. Finally, I give up on the idea of sleep, pushing myself up. I brush myself off, running a hand through my golden blonde hair. My hair was getting so long it was in the middle of my back now.

"Beauty sleep and rolling around in the dirt aren't the same thing, ya know." Rick calls over to me.

I roll my eyes, but a light smile appears on my lips, "Not that it matters, not like I'd look good with either."

"I think you look pretty damn good to me." T-Dog says with a smirk on his lips. Jacqui, who may or may not be in a relationship with T-Dog, slaps his arm.

"Leave the poor girl alone, she isn't eye candy." Jacqui scolds, folding her arms across her chest.

I had yet to ask either of them if they had a thing going on. Because just about now, they seemed like a married couple. I walk over to them, Rick, Jacqui, T-Dog, and Daryl. Who seemed to have faded into the background.

"What time are we leaving?" I ask, flipping my hair over my shoulder.

Rick shrugs, "Eh, when the suns up and everybody else is too. Best to hit the ground running."

"Do your people know how to use weapons?"

"Not the women, out of the women it's only Andrea."

I eye him with a sense of disbelief, "That sounds incredibly sexist, sheriff."

"Can't afford to waste any bullets trying to teach em'." Rick shrugs again, "Just the way it is. Carl carries a gun though, everyone carries a gun. Whether they know how to use it or not. Miracles can happen during some pretty desperate situations."

"Miracles don't happen if you can't figure out the safety." I say with a small smile.

T-Dog looks between Rick and I, "I almost forgot to ask, how do you two know each other?"

Rick bursts out laughing, holding his stomach. The kind of gut wrenching laugh that makes your insides sting, "Oh man. I was really hoping someone would ask that."

"Don't answer it! It's the apocalypse, no one needs to know!" I clamp my hand over his mouth, and he fucking bites me! That fucking narcissistic bastard - argh I knew cops never changed.

I squeal and pull my hand back, "Are you fucking kidding me?" I snarl, shaking my hand, "If I'm bleeding you best hope God saves you from me."

"Brie got into a lot of fights." Rick answers T-Dog's question despite my constant protest. "She had quite the right hook though, that thing was nasty. Just broke every jaw she managed to get her fist to touch."

I flush a bright red, "As if that's going to help during an apocalypse. Punching a walker in the face is just a nice way to get yourself bit." I lean against the RV, "Why do you have to bring up my past? Makes me think about stupid shit from before the apocalypse."

Rick gives me a little smirk, "Making you think of your criminal past is bad? I have a question that's been bugging me since Daryl found you."

"Spit it out then." I say, bouncing a little on my feet.

"How the hell did you survive an apocalypse for this long? Just the two of you? You may be a fighter but you're no killer." Rick asks.

I sigh, running a hand through my hair. "You learn to be one pretty quickly in an apocalypse."

* * *

We pack everything up, I end up driving the charger with Crystal, Carol, and Andrea. Sophia is sandwiched between Carol and Andrea in the backseat. The trunk is loaded to the brim with supplies. We drive for what feels like hours.

We get to the CDC to see walkers every where. We decide to make a run for it.

I grab Crystal tight around the wrist.

"I'll be fine." She snaps, wrenching my hand off of her wrist. "Stop worrying so damn much."

"Hey, I kept you alive this entire fucking apocalypse, I deserve some damn respect." I snarl at her.

Carol and Andrea shift awkwardly in the backseat, both of them sharing an uneasy stare.

I close my eyes for a second, taking a deep breath. I open my door and step out, "Fine, whatever, lets do this." I walk over to the RV and watch Rick, Dale, Carl, Lori, T-Dog, Jacqui climb out. Daryl pulls up on his motorcycle.

"You're the King of Casual, anyone ever tell you that?" I tell him as he cuts the engine. I give a nod towards all of the walkers that seem to have noticed our presence now.

"Don't be cute." He says in that husky sexy tone of his. He swings his leg over the bike, he grabs out an axe, "Well lets do this." He marches forward, knocking down a few walkers.

I run forward, kicking one in the kneecap then stabbing it in the head. We do this for a while until we get to the doors.

Rick knocks angrily on the doors. He screams and kicks the door, "You're killing us!" He shouts so loud the earth could have cracked open.

The door opens with a whoosh and I quickly usher everyone in before pushing myself in. The door shuts immediately behind me and I do a head count. Thank god, I see Crystal's sweating head among them.

I go over to her and hug her, she hugs me back.

"Don't do that." Crystal whispers.

I almost want to ask her what she means by 'do what'. But I'm just so fucking relieved because we're saved! They're going to help us - keep us safe, put us with the other survivors. We're going to live!

I except the CDC to be bustling with people, but it's empty. A man in a white trench coat is staring at us. He looks like he had the wind knocked out of him.

"Welcome to the CDC." He announces, waving his hand over the facility.

"Where is everyone?" Carol asks, holding Sophia to her side.

"Gone. It's just me." The man says, measuring her reaction.

"Just you?" I ask, my voice cracking, "No one? No other survivors?"

"Just me." He repeats.

I feel my jaw drop and I quickly clamp my hand over it. "So basically you're saying, we're still fucked?"

He looks taken back by my bluntness, "Not just yet. We should probably introduce ourselves. I'm Dr. Jenner, I am the only scientist left to help you. You're probably wondering where everyone is.. most of the scientists here left when the outbreaks started. Primarily to be with their families."

"Why did you stay?" Rick asks.

Dr. Jenner considers this for a moment, "I wanted to find the cure. I figured if I just ran, then this whole thing would never end." Dr. Jenner refers to the banging on the door.

I look over at Crystal to see her completely immersed in Dr. Jenner's story. She was obviously clinging to every word. After each word you could see her face lose hope.

"So do you have the cure?" I finally ask, breaking the seemingly never ending silence.

"No."

We all try to hold in our disappointment but he sees it in our faces.

"Though I'm still trying. Why don't you all follow me? We have a recreation room with comfy couches, we have food, alcohol." Dr. Jenner drones on.

When Dr. Jenner says 'alcohol', Daryl makes a small victory noise. "Gon' get shitfaced tonight." He says with a smirk.

* * *

We're all sitting at a huge table. It almost felt normal. It was as if we'd forgotten about the monsters at our doors. Crystal was happily giggling with Andrea and Glenn as she took her first sip of wine. She makes a face and sets it down, shaking her head, laughter lighting up her blue eyes.

"I can see why I never started drinking." Crystal says with laugh.

I take a sip of my wine and I try not to make a face. Though it goes unnoticed by Carol, who nudges me.

"First time too?" Carol asks, nodding towards Crystal.

I give her a nod, clearing my throat, "How could you tell besides the obvious facial distortion?" I turn to her with a teasing smile.

"Eh, you can see the rookies." Carol says with a wink, casually taking a sip of her own wine. "You worry too much, you know that right?"

I down my wine quickly, feeling light headed as the warm liquid fell down my throat. "Tell me something I don't know, please."

"She can take care of herself, believe it or not." Carol says, eyeing Crystal. "She's stronger than you think."

I look over at Crystal as she bursts into laughter, clutching her stomach, tears filling her eyes.

"Yeah, she is." I look down, a smile on my lips as I see her smiling.

Suddenly Daryl leans over me, filling my glass with hard liquor, "You ready for the hard stuff, rookie?" He asks with that redneck twang.

I roll my eyes, looking up at him. His eyes are staring at me, challenging me. I reach for the glass, downing it and then making a face. "Okay, maybe not yet." I say with a cough.

Daryl bursts into laughter, pulling up a chair beside me. "Let me tell you somethin'."

"You're drunk. Not sure if you want to spill all your secrets out like this." I challenge with my eyebrow raised.

Daryl throws his head back, laughing again, "Now now, don't make me wussy out, okay. Now how the fuck do two women survive an apocalypse, no man to help them?"

Now it's my turn to laugh, "Oh sweetie I'm much stronger than you think." I say, reaching for my glass and taking a sip. I feel successful when I don't wince as the bitter liquid forces its way down my throat.

It's going to be a long night, I realize as I can barely see Crystal through these hazy eyes. I down another shot, blinking hard.

Yep, definitely going to take a lot to sleep this hangover off. Damn I was going to regret this in the morning.

* * *

**boom, here it is.**


	4. Chapter 4: The Aftermath

I remember flashes of the previous night. I remember managing to get up from the table with Carol's help. I was rambling on and on about life before the apocalypse.

"You know, I didn't even drink! The world goes to shit so I do too! Isn't that some sick humor or whatever?" I breathed heavily, throwing out a drunken laugh.

"Come on, go to bed. Don't do anything you'll regret." Carol warns me, "Come on rookie." She helps me onto the sofa.

"When the world went to shit I had to jump onto my sister's balcony. Isn't that cool? I had a brother though, was visiting my parents." I suddenly burst into tears, "They're all dead now, because of me."

Carol sits next to me on the couch then, smoothing my hair back, "No sweetie, it wasn't your fault."

I lazily drape my head on her shoulder, "Then whose fault is it? Because it feels like mine. Crystal even said lets go back for them - but I was so selfish." I swear a few times, "So damn selfish."

Carol strokes my hair, "You did what was best."

"Am I a terrible person? Or am I good person that just does terrible things? Okay I don't get this - argh my head." I suddenly bitch, grabbing at my head, closing my eyes. "Argh has the world always been spinning?"

Carol stands up then, letting me fall against the couch, "Get some sleep. You'll feel better in the morning."

Damn was she wrong.

I woke up and I felt like if someone put a bullet in my brain I'd feel better than I did right now. I pulled myself out of the bed, pulling on a pair of tattered jeans, a white tank top, loosely buttoning up a flannel shirt over it. I stagger out of the room and see everyone eating breakfast.

"Well good morning!" Crystal chirps, "You were sleeping like the dead."

"I feel like the dead." I groan, "Please tell me you have some aspirin in this place."

Dr. Jenner looks up, "Top cabinet."

I make a small whiny noise as I realize I can't reach the top cabinet. Instead of asking for help, I just hop up onto the counter. Searching the top shelf for the aspirin, I finally find it and make a mental note to put these on a lower shelf.

I turn on the sink and fill up a glass cup with water. I quickly down the aspirin, tossing my head back.

"Brie, you didn't really try that hard when you buttoned that shirt this morning, did you?" Crystal suddenly asks. I realize that I missed most of the buttons in my struggle to get to the aspirin.

"Ah shit. Come on." I quickly unbutton the few buttons that managed to survive my hangover antics. I button the shirt back up, "Argh, there." I pull out a seat next to Crystal.

"I have to ask you a serious question." Crystal suddenly says in a low voice, leaning towards me.

I turn to her with an eyebrow raised, "Okay..."

"Did you sleep with Daryl?" She asks so quietly it's barely above a whisper.

My laughter is so hard I almost buckle over. "I wear flannel and you assume it's because I slept with Daryl?" I laugh harder and throw myself back in my chair. "Oh kiddo, you're really losing your touch." I pat her on the back, "Pass me the toast."

I hear Crystal's quiet sigh of relief.

"Where is he, anyways?" I ask.

Everyone shrugs.

"I'm going to take some aspirin to him." I say, pushing myself away from the table. I fill up a glass with water and grab some aspirin. Crystal eyes me the entire way as I walk out of the room.

I walk down to the room he's in. I can tell because it's reeking of alcohol. I knock on the door and a shirtless Daryl Dixon answers the door. I shall admit that it is an incredibly pleasing sight.

"Morning sunshine." I said, handing him the glass and aspirin, "Thought you'd need this."

"Argh, you're a god damn angel, you." He says, leaving the door open and walking back in the room. He leads me into the room with his hand, "If you have any cigarettes I'd consider marryin' ya."

I give him a little smile, running a hand through my hair. "I sort of have you to blame for my hangover."

Daryl eyes me, quirking an eyebrow, "You had fun though, didn't ya?"

"From what I can remember. Which is hardly anything." I say, folding my arms over my chest.

Daryl throws the aspirin into his mouth, drinking his water greedily, "I like you in flannel. Sexy."

"And this is the part where I leave." I say with light tease, smiling and turning to leave. He grabs me by the arm and pulls me back.

"Or this is the part where you stay..?" Daryl asks, a devilish glint in his eye.

I roll my eyes, leaning against the wall, "What kind of girl do you think I am?" Giving him a light shove. I walk through the small crack I created between us, "Better hurry, T-Dog is going to eat everything."

* * *

I sit back down next to Crystal and she's eyeing me again. "What is it now?" I ask, turning to her.

"What is going on with you and Daryl?"

The whole table seems to go quiet then, I raise an eyebrow at her.

"I've barely known the guy for a damn week." I say, biting into my toast, "What kind of slut do you think I am? The first semi-attractive guy I see I'm going to let him jump into my pants?"

The table has resumed the buzz of conversation. I roll my eyes and stab my eggs.

Carol sits down next to me, "I had fun last night, lets do that again sometime."

I look up at her as if she's crazy, "You mean dragging me around while I'm drunk is fun?"

Carol shrugs, "You're a pretty happy drunk, provided you're not talking about the apocalypse."

"What did I say?"

"You said a lot of stuff about your past, ex boyfriends, that nasty right hook." Carol grins, "At least we know you can fight off humans too. You almost punched Daryl last night."

"Daryl?"

Carol nodded, "Yeah, I had to tame you both. If I recall correctly, he called you a 'pretty little thing' then you proceeded to try and choke him out. Thank god Sophia was already in bed."

I roll my eyes, leaning back in my chair, stretching, "Sounds like me."

Dr. Jenner stands up, walking out of the room, "Come." He says, as if we're trained puppies rather than people. We do as he says though, as I get up, I see Daryl sneak out of the hallway, grab a piece of toast, wink at me. Then follow us.

We follow him through winding hallways until we end up in a room full of computers.

I lean on one of the high desks, Crystal standing beside me.

"What happens to someone after they're bit. Rick asked me about this last night. We had someone in here who was bitten and we documented their brain activity." Dr. Jenner calls out to his computer, "Vi, bring up test subject number 19."

On the screen is someone's brain, the lights all seem to fizzle out, until just one major organ is working, the stem. The stem controls the body.

"Only the stem is reactivated upon reanimation. All those lights you saw before? Those are what make you.. you. Those are your memories, your emotions, everything that makes you who you are. When you're reanimated, none of that stays." Dr. Jenner says.

I cling onto every word, my heart painfully squeezing.

Dale looks over to see a countdown clock, "What's with the clock?"

Dr. Jenner turns to look at the clock.

"It's counting down." Carol says, clutching Sophia a little closer.

Dr. Jenner remains silent, sighing.

"What the fuck does it mean?" I ask, suddenly breaking the silence.

"Vi." Dr. Jenner says in a small voice.

The animated voice speaks back to him, "It's counting down to when the generators in the basement will run out of fuel, prompting an explosion set to destroy the entire CDC."

Dr. Jenner sits down in his spinning chair, "It sets the air on fire." He presses a button and the doors close. Sophia starts crying and Carol clutches her closer. There are frantic shouts of, 'what are you doing?!'.

"You can't do this!" I shout, walking over to him. "You can't just seal us in here and choose for us!"

Dr. Jenner looks up at me, "It's a merciful way to go, won't even last a second."

I look over at Crystal, she looks panicked and terrified. Her bright blue eyes are begging me to do something.

Daryl starts kicking the door, hitting it with the axe repeatedly.

"That door is bulletproof, you'll never make it through." Dr. Jenner calls.

"Well your head ain't!" Daryl shouts, storming over to Dr. Jenner. Rick catches him halfway.

I grab one of the spinney chairs, sitting in front of Dr. Jenner, "Why on earth would you think we'd be okay with opting out?"

"You've lost so many people. I can see it. You've lost your entire family, your life essentially. Now you have to band with random strangers to prolong your inevitable death." Dr. Jenner says, an eerie air to his words.

"Here's the thing, doc." I say, leaning forward on my knees, "I'm not going to die, I won't let that happen. Why do you think we've been fighting for so long? Did you really think we came here wanting you to set our air on fire for us? Did you really think we said, 'hey lets go to the CDC and let those guys murder us'?"

"It's not murder." Dr. Jenner says defensively.

"Feels a hell of a lot like it. You're willing to kill two kids, women, and a bunch of men.. just to convince yourself you're saving us?" I lean back in the chair, "Sounds a lot like murder."

I push myself off the chair, the chair goes spiraling to the floor. "I hope you realize what a pathetic asshole you are. Just because you want to opt out doesn't mean we want to also." I storm over to Crystal.

"It's going to be okay." I whisper in a low voice, hugging her, though I'm certain we won't be.

Sophia won't stop crying.

_It sets the air on fire._ Is ringing through my head.


	5. Chapter 5: Salvation

Everyone was panicking and shouting at one another to do something. I watched them all go by, as if they were just blurs of motion. I just kept thinking, _so this is how I die_. I felt sick to my stomach, what a ridiculous way to die. No parade, no act of heroism. This was how my story ended. I would never get to see the end of the apocalypse. The apocalypse would be all I knew. The life before the apocalypse would be a distant memory instead of my future.

Crystal is comforting Sophia and Carol. "You're going to be okay." She says to the small crying child, wiping her tears. "Everything is going to be just fine. We'll get out of this." Crystal's eyes briefly connect with mine, begging me to do something, to save everyone.

I sigh, walking over to Dr. Jenner again, who popped open a bottle of whiskey. "You're pretty pathetic, you know that right?"

"Insulting me isn't going to get you out of here." Dr. Jenner says, rolling his eyes, tipping his head back and taking a long chug.

"Then what is? Because obviously trying to appeal to your humanity isn't working - since you obviously don't have any left in you." I clutch the side arms of his chair, "What is going to crack that thick skull of yours, doc?"

Dr. Jenner leans in towards me, menacingly, "I could let you out. But I'll tell you something you already know, deep down in that so-called 'tough' exterior of yours. Your sister." He nods towards Crystal, "She's going to turn, then you're going to have to kill her. Good girls don't survive apocalypses."

I glare at him, "I won't let her turn."

"Who said it was your choice?" Dr. Jenner says, matter-of-factly. "She's going to get bit, maybe just spontaneously die.. then you get to watch her wither away, like I watched my wife." He nods at the screen, "Test subject number 19, that was my wife." He tips the bottle back, draining the bottle again.

I sharply intake my breath, "Not everyone is going to be like your wife."

His eyes get teary, "Oh, but everyone is. Exactly like her. You're all contaminated, when you die - for any random reason, you turn into one of them. If you have a heart attack, you turn into a walker. You're all walkers." He stands up, "Take a look around, everyone you love is going to die. Eventually try to eat you. It's a matter of time, not a matter of how." He turns to me, "Opting out would be merciful, painless, no transformation, just the gateway to heaven, hell, or wherever you're going."

I shake my head because the idea is becoming more and more of a real option. My brain is turning around, flipping on its side, considering it. _Why not? _Right as I think this, Dr. Jenner opens the door.

"If you want a painful, cold, slow death. Be my guest, leave. But I am not taking my chances in a world that resembles hell."

Jacqui gives in first, she sits down next to Dr. Jenner, taking the whiskey and drinking. "I'm staying."

"Lets go!" Daryl shouts, running out the doors. I glance over at Crystal and I see her leaving. I follow her as I hear Andrea proclaim she's staying too. Soon enough our feet begin to race for the doors.

"They're all locked!" Carol shouts when she tries to open one of the doors.

T-Dog throws one of the chairs against the glass. At this point Crystal makes her way over to me, hugging me, silent tears are whispering down her cheeks. "We're going to die." She proclaims, whispering, "Maybe it won't be so bad."

"Hey!" Carol pulls a fucking _grenade_ out of her pocket, "I found this in your pocket when you first came to camp." She tosses it to Rick, he turns it over in his palm.

"Get down!" Rick shouts as he hurls the grenade at the window. Daryl runs over to Crystal and I, shielding us with his body as we all hide behind a chair. The explosion is so loud it's nearly deafening. When the fire clears, we all get up and dart for the window. We run outside, Andrea and Dale follow close behind. Right as we get near the RV, the CDC explodes - as do our chances of a cure ever occurring.

"So that's it." Crystal breathes in my ear as we climb into the charger, "Our lost hope, just gone."

Andrea climbs in, as do Carol and Sophia. There's silence as I put the charger into drive.

"Gone." Crystal repeats, gazing out the window, closing her eyes. "So close." She whispers so softly that I'm the only one that hears her. I give her knee a reassuring squeeze.

* * *

We end up stuck on the highway, cars in our way. We decide to loot for supplies in the abandoned cars. The loss of Jacqui weighs heavily on the group, as T-Dog mopes around. Dale's RV is acting up again, as he uses more duct tape to fix up his already piece of shit engine.

He is talking furiously with Andrea, demanding her gun. She gives him a snarky remark, "Think I'm going to shoot myself with it? I would have done that already." She snaps, storming away from him.

Our group is falling apart when we should be falling together.

"Everyone's losing it." Carol says, coming up behind me with Sophia. "That was too close of a call."

"You're telling me." I say, sitting on the hood of the charger, "Surprised that psychopath let us out."

"Thanks to you." Carol gives me a little smile, "I have to thank you, you saved Sophia's life."

I shift awkwardly, "I wouldn't say it's thanks to me. More of a, I pissed him off enough that he thought by letting us go he'd be smiting me."

"All that shit he said to you about Crystal, isn't true. You're both strong women, if anyone's going to make it, it's you two." Carol has that small smile glued on her face, "He was just trying to get into your head."

I nod, "I figured that out when I almost gave him a right hook." I said with a small laugh, I look at Sophia, "Is that a doll?" I ask, nodding towards it.

Sophia nods shyly, "Had it since I was born."

I give her a small smile, "That's sweet. Crystal has a blankie too, if you ask her about it she'll say it's a blanket. Denial and all." I roll my eyes, "Good to keep something from before all of this." I wave my hand in the motion of the wreckage, "Anyways I'm gonna go scavenge. Why don't you guys just sit in the RV and chill for a little while?"

Carol gives me a hug, "Yeah, be careful, okay? We've had enough losses for one day."

"Hey, make sure you grab Crystal too. I don't want her.." I let my voice break off, allowing Carol to fill in the blanks.

Carol nods, "Of course."

I turn towards the row of cars, starting at a nice looking honda. I find a pack of cigarettes, lighters, mints, few blankets, and a pocket knife. I slide the knife into my pocket. I throw the other items into the bag slung over my shoulder.

I move onto the next car, opening the door to smell decaying flesh. I look over to see a huge blood stain where a person used to be. I'm overwhelmed by the sight of it all, I pull myself out, taking a deep breath. Closing my eyes.

_Damn it Brie, you have to get used to this_. I growl at myself, turning back to the car and scavenging quickly. I find a handgun, roll of yarn, gum, some candy that I plan to give to Sophia and Carl. I throw them into my bag too.

I close the door with a small nod towards the blood stain where a small child used to be. I breathe in the air when I close the door, relieved the stench of death didn't cling to me.

"Walkers!" Dale suddenly shouts frantically, we all look over to see a horde.

"Get under the cars!" You hear Rick shout. It doesn't sound that safe to me, but it's all we've got. I get under a car, right in the middle, my breathing low but rapid. After a few moments, I see walkers trudging by the car I'm under. Soon enough, most if not all of the herd passes my car.

I see a walker crawl under Sophia's car and I want to grasp for her. But she's on her feet and barreling down the hill. You hear someone subduing Carol as she tries to chase after her. I watch Rick kill a few walkers and chase after her, killing a walker that was on her path.

I roll out from under my car to see the herd has mostly scattered and disappeared.

"Sophia!" You hear Carol shout as she heads for the rail, "No!"

I rub the dirt off my knees, "Carol." I say frantically, heading over to her, "She'll be fine, Rick went after her, she'll be fine." I shhh her and hold her close to me as she cries frantically into my shoulder.

Rick soon comes back in about an hour, "Can't find her. Told her to meet me at the creek, but she wasn't there. She probably got lost."

"My baby!" Carol sobs and Lori holds her close.

"I can track, let me help." Daryl says all of a sudden, surprising everyone.

Rick nods, "The sun is going down though, Glenn, Shane, we should canvas the woods. Stay here for the night. In the morning we'll look for her."

"I want to come." I suddenly proclaim.

Rick looks at me, surprised, "You sure about this?" He shoots an uneasy look at Crystal. Who practically begs him with her eyes not to let me go.

"Positive." I nod, "She'll probably be more willing to come to me rather than a group of men."

Rick nods, "Yeah, okay. You can come."

* * *

I have nightmares when I sleep. Nightmares so vivid they feel real, up to the point where I'm telling myself to wake up. I gasp and pull myself awake in the dark RV. I step over the sleeping people beneath my feet. I make it out to see Dale working on the engine.

"Thing's a piece of shit, might as well grab all your stuff and find a new ride." I tell him.

Dale shakes his head, "No way, as long as I got duct tape, I'm going to make this thing work." Dale sighs, fixing his hat, "We need something that feels like a home, just this once."

I sheepishly shove my hands in my pockets, "Anything I can do to help?"

Dale looks up from the engine, surprised, "Aren't you just full of surprises today? Yeah, come over here and hold the duct tape."

I walk over to him, grabbing the duct tape as he rips a piece off. "I feel like I need to do my part."

"You saved all of our lives, you did your part." Dale reassures me, tightening the bolts on the engine and he secures a piece of duct tape. "You'd be a good leader, you know that right? With Shane and Rick's battle for power, everyone's looking over the idea of it being someone else."

I sharply intake my breath, sighing, "I couldn't do that. I couldn't have someone die on my hands, I don't think I'd be able to take it."

"You're stronger than you think." Dale says, looking up at me.

I give him a shy smile, looking down at my feet, "That's just what you think."

* * *

_Pretty long, hope you enjoy it regardless! :)_


	6. Chapter 6: Decisions

The sun rises and as does everyone else. Daryl, Glenn, Rick, Shane, and I are preparing to go into the woods. Each of us stocked to the brim with knives, guns, ammo, and in Daryl's case - arrows.

"Okay, since there's a big area over here and we have large number of people. We'll have Glenn, Daryl, and Brie do this area." Rick waves his hand over a large area on the map he scavenged from a car, "Shane, Andrea and I will look around the area Sophia was supposed to meet us."

"Lets do this." Shane says, clicking his shotgun. Charging into the forest.

I stick one more knife into my boot and slide over the railing, suddenly feeling unsure. I turn around to see Crystal eyeing me sadly, I raise my hand up and wave at her. She gives me a sad smile and goes back into the RV.

"Bring Sophia back, make sure you bring yourself back too." Carol says, placing her palms on either side of my face, "Don't make me lose you and Sophia in the same day."

I give her a small nod, "Of course not. We'll be back soon." I turn and jog to catch up to Daryl and Glenn.

"You've gotten pretty close with Carol." Glenn says, watching as I catch up.

I shrug, "I like her, tough lady. Been through a hell of a lot though." I pull my knife out as I eye the forest for motion. "This whole forest thing creeps me out. The blonde usually dies in this part in movies."

"Then we'd better keep a sharp eye on you." Daryl says with a chuckle.

"I thought people died when they were having sex." Glenn notes.

I laugh, "It's usually the blonde is doing something stupid, or it's the black guy, or whoever is having sex." I run a hand through my golden hair, "I only fall into one of those categories. Well half. Since I'm not doing anything stupid right now."

"You're talkin' aren't ya?" Daryl says, "Talkin' in a forest full of people wantin' ta kill ya oughta be stupid on some planet."

I roll my eyes, "Duly noted."

* * *

We don't find Sophia, we canvas the area and we find nothing, squat. Just a tent full of disappointment, otherwise we come up empty. Carol's relieved to see me but disappointed to see we don't have Sophia.

We tell her we'll try again. This time Lori insists on going, though Rick protests heavily. It eventually ends up that everyone is going.

"We'll split up like this. Daryl, Brie, Carol, Crystal and Lori will canvas this area. Shane, Andrea, T-Dog, Dale, Glenn, Carl and I will canvas this area." Rick folds up the map, "Don't get separated. That's the last thing we need right now. Tie a string around your wrists if that keeps you together."

Carol and I end up walking together.

"Do you think we're going to find her?" Carol asks me in a small voice.

"It's been two nights." I tell her instead of giving a real answer.

"I don't want to think of my little girl out there alone, but I can't help it." Carol says, in a smaller voice, "It keeps me up at night. I try not to cry, but it's so damn hard not to."

I look over at her, "Don't worry, we'll find her."

I don't tell her that we'll find her alive.

After a few minutes of silence, a gunshot rings through the air. We all whirl around.

Lori whispers, "Rick."

Crystal looks at me, "Brie what do you think that was?"

I shrug, "How the hell am I supposed to know? We should head back up to the road though. Maybe they'll meet us back there if something went wrong." I turn in direction of the road.

As we're about to head to the road, a woman on a horse stops us.

"Lori?" She asks frantically to our little group. Lori steps up, "It's Rick." The woman says, "Your boy's been shot."

I recognize the woman immediately, "Maggie?" I gasp.

Maggie looks down at me, "Holy shit." She shakes the fuzz out of her eyes, "Ain't got time for that. Anyways, Lori, hop on, we've gotta go."

"Wait we don't even know this broad!-" Daryl's about to protest but Lori's already swung her leg over the side of the horse. "Damn it." He growls.

"Lead them to Hershel's farm." Maggie nods at me, "Nice seeing you."

Then she takes off on her horse.

"Who the hell was that?" Daryl asks me, stomping over to me.

I turn around to see Crystal smiling from cheek to cheek, "That's my cousin, Maggie."

* * *

I lead them to Hershel's church, as we pull up, I see Maggie and Beth waiting on the front porch. I throw open the door, stepping out. Before I even have both feet on the ground, Beth is hugging me furiously.

"I can't believe it." She's whispering frantically, her arms getting tighter.

"Yeah I still need to breathe." I manage to rasp, peeling her off of me.

Crystal is hugging Maggie and she's crying. "Finally." She's whispering in Maggie's ear over and over, like a broken record.

"Can't believe y'all are alive." Maggie says with her rough farmers twang, "I really can't."

I gasp, as if I'm offended, "Really? You really thought an apocalypse would take me out? I'm mildly offended."

Maggie laughs, "Here come on, lets go inside."

* * *

Daryl corners me inside, "Who are these people? How the hell do ya know em?"

"Maggie and Beth are my cousins, Hershel is my uncle." I say in a hushed tone.

"Can we trust em?"

"Of course we can, they're my family." I snarl at him, "What is with you and trust issues?"

Daryl rolls his eyes, "Whatever, just, whatever." He storms away from me, leaving me dazed and confused. Was he on his period? What the fuck was his problem? I see Hershel come out of the room Carl is in.

"Brie." He says, a smile lighting up his elderly face. He hugs me to him, he smells like smoke and peppermint. "Course you'd survive. Should have known. Was wondering when you two would get here. Didn't expect a group though."

I shrug, leaning against the wall, "Crystal found them, she trusts them."

"But do you?"

"They're good people."

Silence ensues and Hershel shoots a look at the staircase, "We have two spare bedrooms, one for you, one for Crystal. Your people will have to set up camp outside." I feel a shiver run down my spine when he says 'your people.'

"Shane and Otis are making a run, we need medical supplies or Carl won't make it." Hershel suddenly adds.

"Okay, Shane's capable, he can get out and in pretty quickly." I say, "I'll go get Crystal."

Hershel nods, "You go do that."

I walk outside to see Shane and Otis packing up. Otis sees me and his face lights up.

"Been forever since I've seen ya kid." Otis says, throwing his arms around me and hugging me. "Funny that we meet again except we're saying goodbye this time." Otis says with a dry laugh.

"Hey, when you come back, we have an entire apocalypse to talk about." I say with a light tease.

Otis releases me, a smile on his face, "Damn right we do. Catch ya later, kid." He says, climbing into the car with Shane.

I give him a little wave as they drive off. I sigh and turn towards the house, climbing up the steps. I glance around, so unused to being somewhere without walkers. There probably weren't any for miles. Just this nice little piece of untouched land. A little piece of heaven inside of hell. Almost seemed too unreal.

"What's the verdict?" I ask as I walk into the kitchen, seeing Hershel, Rick, and Daryl sitting at the table.

"Your people can stay until you find that little girl." Hershel says, sipping his tea, "Otherwise you're gone. You and Crystal are welcome to stay though."

I rock a little on my feet, looking at the ground. I look up to see Daryl staring intensely at me, "Have you talked to Crystal about it?"

"She's okay with it, as I hope you will be too. Family sticks together." Hershel adds the last part with a smile on his withered face.

I shift uncomfortably, everyone awaiting my answer. Then Dale, saves the day. He walks in, seeing me, "What are you guys talking about?"

Daryl speaks up, "We've all gotta split when we find Sophia, Brie and Crystal get to stay though."

Dale looks over at me, "Brie.." He says softly, as if he's going to convince me to run off with them.

"I'm going to go grab my stuff." I say instead, turning on my heel and leaving the room. I walk outside, breathing in the country air. I walk over to my charger, opening the trunk. I grab my small backpack out of the trunk, swinging it over my shoulder. Crystal comes up to me.

"You're not seriously considering going with them are you?"

I slam the trunk shut, "I don't know what I'm going to do."

"The decision is easy, stay here with me."

I turn around to face her, sighing, "But those people-"

"Are just that, people. They're fellow survivors, they're not friends, Brie." Crystal snaps at me, getting angry, "We stick together Brie. Family. Sticks. Together."

Instead of answering her, I head towards the house. I barrel up the steps and see Maggie in her room.

"Any idea which room is mine?"

Maggie turns around, startled at my sudden appearance, "Last door on the left. Crystal's is right across from yours." Maggie turns back to look out the window, "Saw you two fighting."

I nod, "Yeah."

"You barely know those people." Maggie says, nodding at Dale climbing on top of the RV, "Why should you give a shit about them?"

I sigh, looking down at my feet, "Because they give a shit about me." I turn around and head for the last door on the left. I open the door and see a queen sized mattress. I take note that this is the guest room. I drop my bag on the floor next to the bed, plopping down in it.

"What am I going to do?"


	7. Chapter 7: The Clocks Tick

I hear cries outside my window. I get up and walk over to the window, seeing the truck pull into the driveway. I see Shane clamber out of the car, his ankle profusely bleeding. No Otis.

I barrel down the steps, ready to launch my fist at his face. Rick catches me when I leap, "Put me down! I'm going to kill that bastard!" I'm shouting at the top of my lungs. I struggle in Rick's grasp as Shane limps his way into the house. He catches my eye but releases it just as quickly.

"You killed Otis!" I cry out after him as Hershel follows him into the kitchen. I let my body fall limp and Rick lets me go.

"You calm now?" Rick says, placing his palm on my face, "We need to figure out what happened, okay?"

I'm so angry and just filled to the brim with fire, but I just nod and let him lead me to the kitchen.

Hershel is helping Shane wrap up his bleeding ankle as he instructs Maggie to take the equipment to Carl. I lean against the wall, barely breathing.

"What happened?" Rick finally asks Shane when Hershel leaves the room.

"We ran into a herd out there." Shane hiccups, swallowing hard, "We grabbed the equipment, but they must've heard us in there. We had to distract them and run for it. Otis..." Shane swallows hard again, looking at me, "Otis was tackled by one of the walkers. It was too late, man. Too damn late. I had to go, I had to save Carl."

I hear Patricia screaming somewhere in the house, yet everyone's eyes are on me.

Maggie puts an arm around my shoulders, giving me a gentle squeeze, "I know you loved him." She said softly, "But you've got to let him go."

"I did." I shrug her arm off and go outside.

* * *

The cold night air is illuminated with a fire. Crystal, Carol, and Andrea are sitting around the bonfire, roasting marshmallows. Crystal sees me and tries to wave me over, but I just give her a light shake of my head.

"Why not?"

I turn around, startled by the gruff voice to see Daryl Dixon. "Roasting marshmallows after someone dies seems a bit too evil to me."

Daryl chuckles, "Best get used to it, we're all going to die."

Silence ensues and I shift uncomfortably, "You have a positive way of thinking." I mutter sarcastically.

Daryl ignores my comment, "Are you coming with the group when we find Sophia?"

I sigh, leaning against the house, "What do you want me to say? Everyone keeps asking me and I keep saying the wrong thing."

"Say that you'll come with us."

I look over at him, "Abandon safety and security for a life on the road again? I tried that once, remember? Almost got myself and Crystal killed. I don't think I could handle losing Crystal again."

Daryl sighs too, leaning against the house also, "You should convince Hershel to let us stay."

I laugh, "Do you really think he'd listen to me? He thinks I'm trouble in a small package."

Daryl looks over at me, a smirk on his lips, "He wouldn't be wrong."

My face goes up in red. Then, Dale, who seems to keep appearing out of no where, appears. "Hey Brie, just wanted to see if you were okay."

I give him a small smile, standing up off the wall, "Yeah, I'm fine."

"I wanted to talk to you about something serious." Dale gives a look at Daryl, "Do you mind?"

Daryl puts his hands up in defense, "Fine." He grunts, storming off near the campfire.

"What's up?" I ask.

"The group is falling apart." Dale says nervously, "Rick and Shane got into it a few minutes ago. Rick thinks that Shane killed Otis, as do I. This group needs you - you can't just-"

"Dale, Dale, stop." I stop him, "Are you trying to ask me to stay with you guys?"

Dale nods nervously, "This group was falling apart before you came. Shane was power hungry, then Rick came along and I thought - great, our group will be fine. Then the attack at the camp and.."

I put a hand on Dale's shoulder, "Hey, hey, calm down. I don't have the slightest idea what I'm going to do. Everyone keeps pulling me in different directions, I just need to think.. okay?"

Dale nods eagerly, "Anyways, we should probably all get some sleep. It's been a hard day."

"Good night Dale." I say, patting him on the back as I walk back into the house.

* * *

I wake up, stretching my sore body. I peel my eyes open with the jaws of life. I clamber out of bed, changing into a pair of ripped jeans and a loose fitting black tank top. I tear a brush through my hair then open my door.

"Is that girl up yet? She sleeps like the dead." I hear.

"Someone wanna go put her out of her misery?"

Laughter ensues after the comment, I clamber down the stairs to see Maggie, Hershel, Beth, Patricia, and Crystal sitting at the kitchen table eating eggs.

"Ha ha, you're all so hilarious." I say with a smile. I turn to look outside to see the group huddled together, "What are they doing?"

"No idea." Crystal answers, taking a bite out of her eggs, "Why don't you go see?"

I'm already halfway out the door.

I walk over to them, seeing them loading guns. "What are you guys doing?" I call, as I pull up beside them.

"Looking for Sophia." Shane grumbles.

"You wanna help?" Rick asks hesitantly, "You don't have to. I know you just found your family and probably don't-" Suddenly, off in the distance, a loud mustang is heard. The gate is flung open and flung shut as a mustang tears across the horizon.

"The hell is that?" Shane asks, taking out his gun and charging towards the car. We all follow him to the driveway as the man steps out of the mustang. I recognize him the minute his head comes out of the car.

Tears fill my eyes and I'm forgetting how to breathe, "Damon." I barely whisper.

The blonde hair in the man's eyes is brushed away when his blue eyes, the same as Crystal's, hit my green eyes. He looks like me, as any older brother would. He shuts the car door and shakes his head, a smirk on his lips.

"You've gotta be fucking kidding me." He says, his husky voice just as familiar as I dreamed.

Crystal comes out of the house then. She sees the familiar man and her eyes fill with tears. Damon turns towards the house to see her, his smile widens. "Double the trouble as always, eh?"

Crystal barrels down the steps, throwing her arms around his neck, squealing. "I can't believe it!" Hershel, Maggie, and Beth come out of the house then.

"We forgot to tell you." Hershel says gruffly to my questioning stare.

Damon releases Crystal and walks over to me, picking me up around my waist and spinning me. "Damn it, kid. Thought you were dead for so long." He buries his face into my neck.

"Same with you." I answer, adding a dry laugh. I pat him on the back, "Don't worry, here to take care of you now."

"Hah, the apocalypse hardened me, little sister." Damon sets me back on my feet, "Don't need you babying me anymore."

"Wouldn't say babying, I'd say 'keeping safe'." I say with a strict look, "How do you think we got so far? Good luck doesn't get too far. Though that's all we seem to be running on."

"Who the fuck are you?" Daryl asks, walking over to us with Rick on his heels.

I step out of Damon's grip and I jerk a thumb at him, "This is my big brother." I say with a smile on my lips.

I couldn't help but think I heard a small hint of jealousy in Daryl's voice. He seems visibly relieved, but he catches me eyeing him - and that cold exterior comes back again.

Dale seems a bit annoyed, I'm almost certain he'll corner me about Damon later.

"Breaking hearts as of late?" Damon asks, drawing his eyes from Daryl to me.

I raise my eyebrows, slightly surprised, "You think I have time for that in an apocalypse?" I give him a dry laugh, "Got a whole line of men waiting." I wave my hand toward the forest, "They just want to eat my brains."

Damon laughs, throwing an arm around my shoulders, "Come on, lets talk over tea." He guides me to the house, "I'm certain you've got plenty of apocalypse stories to share."

* * *

Last time I checked, my big brother was dead. Now he was sitting across from me sipping hot tea, as if he'd just been hiding this entire apocalypse. I was awe struck by his sudden appearance, taken completely off guard.

I thought he was dead. I left him behind because I thought he was dead. What kind of family does that?

"I know what you're thinking." Damon sing-songs, sipping his tea, "I wasn't there."

"What?"

"I sneaked out." Damon offers as an explanation, "I drove into the country with my girlfriend. The apocalypse hit and she freaked, ran out of the car. I kept telling her, _stop you'll be safe with me_. She was so determined to get back to her family though." Damon sighs, "I just kept driving, until I ended up here."

"So you just left us?" I ask, my voice cracking, "Why didn't you turn around?"

Silence ensues.

"Don't do that, Brie." Crystal snaps at me, "We just got him back but you're sitting there criticizing him. Did you tell him that you're considering leaving with those people?"

Damon eyes me, "What is she talking about?" He asks, referring to Crystal.

I look down at my almost-cold tea, licking my lips nervously. "I'm considering leaving with them." I say so quietly I almost hope he can't hear me.

"Why?"

"Because she cares too damn much about them!" Crystal suddenly shouts, "You barely know them!"

I bite my lip, highly aware of the cold looks I was getting.

"Family sticks together." Damon says.

"Then why didn't you come back?" I ask, drawing my eyes up to meet his again. "Why did you keep going?"

Damon looks at me with sad eyes, sighing, he sets his tea cup down. "I was scared. I was scared that you two didn't make it, I didn't want to see you guys dead. Torn to shreds by.. walkers." There's a shake in his voice as he talks.

"Brie you can't leave us." Crystal says, ignoring Damon completely, "You just can't."

I'm tempted to bring up the fact she totally ditched me when we were together. That she asked for this, she thought she could survive an apocalypse by herself. But she needed me more than she'd ever realize.

"Those people.. they need me." I say as softly as I can. "I care about them."

"Them or him?" Damon asks.

I look up, startled, "What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about Daryl fucking Dixon." Damon nods his head towards the tents outside the window. "What the fuck is going on with you?"

I glare at him, "Nothing is going on with me. I'm surviving a god damn apocalypse and y'all sitting here criticizing me for giving a shit about people who don't share the same blood as me! It's called being _human_!" I snap, pushing myself from the table and standing up, "I'm going for a walk."

Damon and Crystal share a sad look before letting me go.

"I wasn't eavesdropping." Rick says as I pass by him towards the door.

"The hell you weren't." I roll my eyes, "Come on, Carl's going to be knocked out for a few hours, lets walk."

Rick nods and follows me outside, the sun is setting.

"I don't want you to do anything you don't want to do." Rick suddenly says, breaking the silence. I look up at him.

"That's really never been the case."

Rick runs a hand through his curly brown hair, "It's just, you're so different from everyone. You're nothing like the girl before the apocalypse. Wild and impulsive, you've, for lack of better words - grown up."

"Nah, I'm still wild and impulsive. I'm just getting a lot better at hiding it." I say with a smile on my lips, "You're still the same narcissistic bastard you were before. Difference is that I'm not in cuffs."

Rick laughs, dimples forming in his cheeks, "You're going to be okay. We'll be okay if you decide to stay with your family. No one can make you leave them again. Not me, not Dale.. not even Daryl."

I run a hand through my long golden blonde hair, "I thought my brother was dead. Now he's sitting in that kitchen." I nod towards the house, "Carl's recovering, I'm running out of time."

"Welcome to the apocalypse." Rick says.


	8. Chapter 8: Monsters In the Woods

I wasn't exaggerating when I said I was running out of time. The batteries in one of the clocks died, whether this was symbolism or not was beyond me. I wake up on a comfy bed, rolling over, groaning when I see the sun. I get out of bed, clad in a tank top as I walk over to the dresser. I grab a red plaid shirt and swing it on over my black tank top, not bothering to button it up. I grab a pair of ripped blue shorts, deeming it as a warm day.

I walk over to the window to see Carl outside, laughing with Lori as they eat eggs. I smile as I note that he's recovering, though if he moves a certain way, pain lights up his childlike eyes. I watch Lori watch Carl with a striking intensity before turning away from the window. I step into my black boots, putting knives into them and finally setting a gun into my waistband before going downstairs.

"Sleeping beauty awakens." Hershel notes as I walk into the main dining room, shocked to see Daryl and Rick in there. "We were just talking about you."

"Is that my cue to bolt?" I ask, awkwardly wavering in the door way.

"Good things." Hershel revises, a smile on his lips as he bites into an egg, "Take a seat."

I do as he says, taking a seat at the foot of the table, "What's up?"

Hershel bites into an egg, "We need to know your decision."

I gap at him, "But we haven't- but he hasn't-" I'm fumbling for excuses and the dead clock in my room seems to be taunting me. "I-" I'm fumbling for words that aren't there.

"I wouldn't be mad if you left with them. I however cannot say the same for your brother and sister."

At the mention of them, my heart drops, what if something were to happen and I wasn't there? What if they got attacked by walkers and I was touring the countryside? The what ifs' are endless and taunting.

"I know it's unfair to force you to make a decision right now." Hershel says slowly, his glossy blue eyes staring at me. I could swear in that moment I saw Crystal and Damon staring at me, begging me to stay.

"Let us find Sophia first." I breathe, "You can't just throw these people to the walkers. You have no idea what's out there. You've been in this house, sheltered from all of the awful things from the beginning of this apocalypse." I look up at him, "You can't un-see the things I've seen, though I've tried."

Hershel cuts his egg, biting into it, "When your people find Sophia, you'll leave." He then looks at me, his tone serious, "When your people find Sophia, you'll need to make a decision. Please make it the right one." Hershel pushes away from the table, done with his egg. He leaves the room, patting me on the shoulder as he exits.

I sigh, leaning back in the chair. Acutely aware of Rick and Daryl's prompting gazes.

"Stop staring." I finally mutter, "I don't know." I say, pushing away from the table and walking in the opposite direction of Hershel, out the doors.

* * *

I walk over to Carol, sitting down next to her as she washes clothes.

"Everyone still attacking you over your decision?" Carol asks, smiling at me.

"Yep." I say, running my hand through my hair, "These people are going to be the death of me."

"Daryl's been freaking out. You should see him when he's drunk and raging." Carol laughs softly, "You're all he talks about now."

I eye her, raising an eyebrow, "What does he say?"

Carol smirks, as if she's caught me, "He mentioned that you look sexy in plaid." She nods at my attire for today, "That'll probably be his rant for tonight."

I roll my eyes, though I'm furiously blushing, "It's probably nothing."

Carol picks up the bucket, with a smile she says, "Or maybe it's something." She says, squeezing my shoulder and walking away.

* * *

I forgot there was a pack of cigarettes when I was looting. I find it in my bag, I quickly stash it in my back pocket, along with a lighter. I walk outside again to see Daryl practicing with his cross bow.

"Why do you bother?" I ask, walking over to him.

"Gotta keep myself sharp." He says, peeking through the eye hole again.

I casually take the cigarettes out of my pocket and light one, now he's focused on me.

"Didn't know you smoked."

"The apocalypse made me start." I say, holding out the pack to him, "Want one?"

Daryl rolls his eyes, but with a smile he takes one out and lights it. He sets his crossbow down, "Plaid today?" He asks, eyeing me like I'm a piece of meat.

"I know you find it irresistible." I say with a teasing tone.

Daryl laughs, breathing out smoke with each chuckle, "Carol told you about that?"

"So did you, at the CDC." I say, putting the pack in my back pocket, "Or were you too hungover to remember that? By the way, you want to tell me about those famous rants of yours?"

"Can't keep her mouth shut can she?" He grumbles, the cigarette clad between his lips.

Just for future reference, he makes smoking look sexy - and that's saying a lot.

"So you're not going to tell me?"

Daryl looks over at me, cocking an eyebrow, "How about you tell me bout' your decision, and I'll tell you."

I lick my lips, rolling my eyes and looking away from him, "You caught me."

Daryl takes in some of the cigarette, his lips puckering as he breathes in. "Knew that'd get ya. Your siblings ought to be a wild card in your decision, eh? With your brother coming back from the dead?"

I sigh, blowing out smoke, "Yeah, though they're getting on my last nerve. The whole 'family sticks together' argument is getting pretty old." I nod the cigarette as the ash falls off the tip.

"I'd say we're like family to you too."

I eye him, "My brother doesn't tell me he thinks I look sexy in plaid." I point out.

Daryl smirks, shaking his head, "Maybe he just doesn't want to influence incest." He finishes his cigarette and drops it on the ground, looking at me with a fire in his eyes. "You're going to pick us, aren't ya?"

"Stop asking."

Daryl reaches behind me then, into my back pocket, pulling out the pack of cigarettes and the lighter. He's so close I can feel his breath on my neck. I have to draw in a quick breath before I pass out at the proximity. He finally withdraws from me after what feels like hours.

"Bet your brother doesn't do that either." He says as an explanation, placing a cigarette between his lips with a smirk.

I roll my eyes, dropping my cigarette and stepping on it with my boot. "He definitely does not." I smile at my feet though, I can see him watching me. "All of you people just keep making my decision harder."

"Just pick us, that'll make it easier. Your siblings, Hershel, Maggie, Beth, they'll all be safe here." Daryl nods towards the house, "They've got it better than mostly everyone in this damn apocalypse. They'll be just fine."

"That falls under making my decision harder."

"Good."

I look over at him, "I just can't imagine going back out there. Constantly on the tip of my toes, jumping at shadows..."

"You'll have me jumping at them for ya."

"Oi, you, the small blonde chick that resembles me, except a less hot version!" Damon suddenly shouts from the screen porch, totally interrupting our moment (if I can call it that).

"What the fuck do you want?" I ask, turning around to face him.

"What the fuck do you think I want? To talk to my little sister who's been survivin' an apocalypse without her big brother!" Damon says, rolling his eyes, "Come on now."

"I think you're definitely the more hot version if that makes up for anything." Daryl says with a sly smirk. He then leans towards me again, at first I think he's going to kiss me, but then I feel his hand in my back pocket, fishing out the pack of cigarettes. "Thanks blondie." He says, that smirk still on his face that he could probably get away with murder with.

"No problem." I say with a smile, turning away from him, "I'll try to find more plaid for you." I say with a teasing smile thrown over my shoulder as I walk towards Damon.

"You better." Daryl says, turning back towards his target, a grin still set between his lips.

"The fuck was that about?" Damon asks, sounding as if he's personally offended.

"Don't worry about it. Your little sister knows what she's doing." I say, tapping him on the tip of his nose.

"She better because I don't have a damn clue." Damon lets me in first, to undoubtedly shoot a glare at Daryl as I pass by him into the house.

* * *

"You just bolted from the car?" Damon asks my sister, Crystal, in disbelief.

Crystal nods, "Yep, I just lost it. But if I hadn't done that, we wouldn't have met the group and found you again." Crystal says as an explanation "It all worked out for the better."

Damon looks like he's willing to contradict it with the name of Daryl Dixon on his lips. "Daryl and I got history, you know that right?" He suddenly says, turning to me.

"Key word, history." I say slyly, "Why should I care?"

"He is nothing but trouble. If you look up trouble on wikipedia, that whole page is about him." Damon shakes his head, staring into his water. "I don't want you hanging around him."

I roll my eyes, "You couldn't order me around before, what makes you think that you can do it now?"

"He's going to get you killed. He's reckless and impulsive." Damon suddenly slams his fist on the table, "I can see it, you're going to choose them."

Crystal gasps, looking at me with accusations and a plethora of insults in her mind. "You wouldn't." She manages to stutter through clenched teeth, "You can't do that-!"

"I didn't say I was going to!-"

"So good, you're picking us then, right?" Damon suddenly cuts me off.

I push away from the table, "Can y'all just shut the fuck up?!" I'm standing now, shaking with anger, "Stop trying to decide for me! I think I can figure out which decision is more life threatening." I stomp out of the house, muttering about, "Fucking siblings, been taking care of one for most of the apocalypse and this is the thanks I get."

I was angry, pissed was more of the word. Ready to rip off heads with just the flick of the wrist. There were more important things, more important than my decision. The most important thing right now was that terrified little girl hiding in the woods.

She needed us and we were sitting here fretting over me rather than her. I walk over to the truck, grabbing out a map. I was being stupid and impulsive, I'm highly aware of that. But that little girl needed me just as badly as I needed her right now. That pure innocence she seemed to exude just by being here. She was our last hope for sanity. For Carol.

I designated an area, circling it with a red pen. Then I charged towards the woods, ready to take on the monsters that kept that little girl in the woods.


	9. Chapter 9: Show the World

Being reckless and impulsive was sort of my thing. I let my anger lead my feet rather than my head. Probably why I ended up whisking myself through the woods with a fever. I was shoving branches out of my way only to have them crinkle under my feet. The woods were eerily calm, despite my heavy breathing after a while. It felt like hours, racking the woods with my eyes. Desperate for the flash of a small little girl to dance on the edges of my eyesight. Nothing though. Nothing at all. Just me, as always.

I head back, disappointed I didn't run into _anything_. That had to be a good sign though, it had to say that Sophia would be fine. If I couldn't find anything, maybe she couldn't either. I find the group huddled around the map, eyeing the circled red area. They all look up as I approach, a different mix of emotions on each of their faces.

"Where the hell were you?" Crystal asks, walking over to me, holding up the map, "Just some shady red circle and you're gone? You can't do that."

I fumble for an excuse, as I've found myself doing more of lately. "Needed to clear my head." I manage to say, though the hurt doesn't manage to leave her eyes.

She nods, as if she's trying to understand - roll the idea over in her head. Though it's obvious it's not clicking, nothing is clicking.

"I'm going to bed." I finally say, breaking the silence, "I'm tired." I'm not sure if they understand the plethora of meanings I have behind that simple statement. I was tired of being harassed, being confused, being pulled in one direction then dragged into the other. This apocalypse was taking a toll on my sanity, and I couldn't let it. I had to stay strong, for the people that were staring at me with worried eyes. The ones who rolled over on the ground in the middle of the night wondering when they would have another meal. I needed to be strong for them. I cared too much, Crystal was right all along. I got attached.

"Okay." Crystal manages to say, looking up at the darkening sky, "Me too."

* * *

I don't have nightmares, I have memories, which is honestly just as bad. They come in waves, small little tidbits of my childhood, easy happy tidbits. When everyone was alive and the screams of my life didn't haunt me.

**_Note: Italicized are memories. ~ is the break between the memories, the shift. _**

_"You're pretty amazing, you know that right?" I look up to see Damon looking intensely at me. His eyes are glassy and I've just saved him from another night of ridicule from our parents. I tuck him into his bed._

_"I better be if I have to keep saving your ass." I mumble, taking his hat off his head. "If you puke, don't do it on the floor." I add, making a point to kick the bucket by his bed._

_"I don't know what I'd do without you." Damon manages to slur through his drunken haze. "Thanks."_

_I nod, though I'm getting tired of it all. Having to constantly baby him doesn't really fit into being the younger sibling. It should have been the other way around, but no, it wasn't like that at all. I was always caring for my older siblings with a fever. Steering them in every direction that I thought was the right one. I was wrong sometimes, but it helped put me to sleep if I thought they were okay._

_"Crystal!" I shout over the ruckus of the music to find her in a booth. She's sitting there, her legs swung over the lap of her boyfriend Logan. She's grinning maniacally and he looks like he's struck gold._

_"Awh, why do you have to ruin my fun?" She says, a pout to her pouty pink lips. She tightens her arms around Logan's neck, "I was just starting to have fun."_

_"Come on, we should go." I say quickly, obviously out of my element. I was more for curling up in bed and abandoning the world inside of a book. Having to come chase my sister through the night scene wasn't something I should have to do._

_Crystal still has her lips formed into a pout, "I don't feel like it."_

_"Do you want me to leave?"_

_"Fine!" She snaps, "Go ahead, Logan will give me a ride home!"_

_Instead of arguing, I left her there. She came into my room at 4 AM in tears, screaming that Logan broke up with her for not wanting to sleep with him. She curled up into my bed and cried into my pillows until she passed out from being so drunk._

I wake up, gasping for air. I run a hand through my knotted wavy blonde hair, biting my lip and looking at the door. I hated the memories more than I hated the nightmares. I've had nightmares about being eaten by walkers, and that didn't measure up to what had just happened.

I throw the covers off of me, unable to cope with the strangling feel of them around my legs. I walk over to the window, throwing them open to feel the cold October air against my skin. I breathe it in, trying to close my eyes - flood the memories out with sheer will.

_I thought it was a good idea to go over to Logan's, try to coax him into taking my sobbing sister back. Though things went wrong too quickly and I was being hauled out in hand cuffs and him in an ambulance. I felt achieved, like I'd done something. Though when I called my sister for bail, she turned me away so fast it was as if we were strangers._

_"I need you." I beg into the phone, "I did it for you."_

_"It was stupid and reckless." That's all she says. Then she hangs up the phone and acts like I'd never called in the first place._

"Stop stop stop." I'm chanting, I hate the memories, I hate them all. I hate the happiness, the smiling, the laughing, everything about it made me want to vomit. I go downstairs and break into Hershel's liquor cabinet. I was never a drinker, though the apocalypse was a first for everything. I grabbed a bottle of brandy and worked my way up the stairs. I popped the cork and drank until the sun came up.

Hershel found me on the floor, sitting there, smoking a cigarette and transitioning between the brandy and the cigarette. I was a sad case indeed.

"You've crashed, huh?" Hershel asked me, standing in the door way. "Wondered how long it'd take you."

I raise a bottle of brandy at him, "Crashed right now, recovery is pending." I say with a dry drunken laugh. "What have I turned into Hershel? Some walker killing badass? Is that what I want to be remembered as?"

Hershel walks over to my position on the floor, sitting next to me. "You've turned into what you needed to be in order to survive."

The laughter gets laughter and I hiccup, "I'm pretty sucky. I'm pretty shitty, actually." I revise, tipping my head back to let the brandy drizzle down my throat. "I'm still reckless and impulsive."

"No you're not." He says, putting a hand on my knee, "You do what needs to get done."

I set the brandy down beside me, "Nah, I do what _I _think is right. Rick didn't come to you about me running off into the woods? Little Red Riding Hood in training, eh?" I laugh again, drier, stinging my throat. "I can't even track, I don't know if I was even in that area."

"You weren't. You worried everyone."

The laughter is obnoxious and not heart felt, "Yeah, worried a bunch of people that barely know me. I saved a punch of people I barely know. Would I have done that before the apocalypse? _Hell no_. I hated people before all this shit went down. Now they're my only means of survival." I pick the brandy up again, turning it over in my hands, "I'm using them, Hershel."

Hershel looks at me, curiously, taking the brandy from me, he sits it on his side away from me. "You care about them."

"I wish I didn't sometimes."

He's still looking at me, curiosity unwavering in his blue eyes, "And why is that?"

"Because if I didn't, I wouldn't be crashing right now. Everything has been leading to this, right? Crystal running out of that car, almost dying at the CDC, Sophia... Otis." I gulp the last part, feeling the raw pain crash through my chest. The wounds were still fresh, I just had yet to touch them or acknowledge them.

"I was doomed from the start." I say, making a play for the brandy, but Hershel just slaps my hand away.

"No, you are not. You are strong, Brie. You were strong before the apocalypse and you're strong now. You're just.. more scared than you'd ever let on." Hershel says, smiling at me sadly, "It's okay to be scared sometimes."

I close my eyes and a tear slides down my cheek, "I just don't want anyone to die."

"Sophia and Otis weren't your fault, Brie."

"I just keep thinking of all the ways I could have stopped it-"

"It would have been you then."

"No-"

"Yes."

I look over at him, sighing and running a hand through my hair. "I'm pathetic, aren't I?"

Hershel stands up then, making a very old-man like sound, "No, you're just crashing." He says, mussing my hair, "Get to sleep and we'll talk when you're sober." He makes a point to grab the brandy and say, "I'm locking this up."

I roll my eyes, picking myself up only to drop in bed.

I was crashing fast.

* * *

Waking up with a hangover was not something I thought I'd have to do again. I woke up thinking about Sophia, then I thought about Otis and I had to turn my face into my pillow.

Hershel was right, there was absolutely nothing I could do now. All I could do was hope that a little girl was still running through the woods.

"Hungover?" Rick asks, standing in my doorway.

I pick myself up, rubbing my forehead, "Yeah, just a tad bit."

"What you did was reckless."

I sigh, dropping myself back onto the bed, "If you're going to bitch at me I'd prefer you did it when I wasn't hungover."

"You worried everyone." Rick walks over to the foot of my bed, "You can't do that ever again."

"Yep, got it. No more running into the woods." I give him a thumbs up and a wink, "Got it, sheriff."

"Do you think I'm kidding?"

"Course' not."

"Good, because I'm not. We don't have time to worry about you."

"Well that's dandy because I wasn't asking you to _worry about me!_" I snap, pulling myself up angrily. "All of you people need to stop.. _caring about me!_" I snarl, "I'm just.. trouble."

Rick eyes me sadly, "Is that really what you think?"

"Yes! That's really what I think!"

"You saved our lives."

"I've already given my you're welcome speech a dozen times. You don't have to give a shit about me anymore." I say.

"Brie, we're family now."

He says it so slyly, so easily the words came out of his lips, I just stare at him in amazement. Unsure whether to curse him out or hug him. Rick was confusing like that, he was a raging narcissist one second and the next, he was this. Rick and I had history, we couldn't debate that. My criminal record would have thrown every debate out the window.

"Troublesome Brie Evans is family now?" I give him a small teasing smile, "You're probably going to get fired for that officer."

* * *

_Just sort of a filler chapter! Someone mentioned in a review that we didn't know Brie that well, so I wanted to give you guys a little overview of what she was really like. So here's my 'Brie breaks down and flashes some humanity' chapter for you all to really get to know her. What she's all about._

_Reviews would be awesome, but favorites still make me happy inside! Haha, thanks for reading!_

_xoxox_


	10. Chapter 10

"Hey! Brie!" I whirl around at the mention of my name to see my sister bounding down the steps. She's wearing dark blue flats with a bow on them paired with a dark blue skirt and a white blouse rolled up to her elbows. "I need to talk to you."

"Yeah, what's up?" I ask, walking over to her with my arms folded over my chest. "Something wrong?"

Crystal gives me a smile, "Nothing, just thought we should catch up. You've been so busy with the group and I've been with Damon. We haven't had a lot of talking time since this whole apocalypse started."

I nod, agreeing with her, "Yeah, apparently being on your toes all the time doesn't leave much room for conversation."

Crystal gestures for me to keep walking, "Come on, lets walk. We haven't been touring this place enough. Staring at that white wall in my room is getting exhausting. As entertaining as a plain wall is..." She lets her voice drop, "Lets talk about you."

I raise my eyebrows at her, "Me?"

She nods, a smirk on her lips, "Damon's worried about you."

"I didn't ask him to be."

Crystal sighs, her blue eyes falling to her feet, "Here's the thing Brie. You can't really control when someone worries about you. You've been worrying about me this entire apocalypse."

"For good reason."

"And that is?"

I look up at her, "You can't kill walkers. Remember? You tried to?"

_Flashback_

_It was simple, get in, get out. Grab as much gas and supplies as we can and leave. We've hit a few gas stations on our way to Atlanta, but there never seemed to be enough. I let Crystal go off into a corner by herself to grab gas. Then I heard her scream._

_"Brie help!" She cried, she was on the floor, scurrying like a mouse._

_I dart over to her to see her holding a gun in her hand, shaking. "I can't do it." She's pleading, "I-I can't!"_

_"Pull the damn trigger!" I urge her, but she just keeps shaking and crawling away._

_Finally I shove my knife into the walker's eye. The walker was young, around my age, mid 20s, long brown hair. Probably incredibly pretty before zombies ate her face off. She drops to the ground, dead and lifeless._

_"I'm sorry." Crystal whispers as I offer her a hand. "I can't."_

"That was one time." Crystal says between her teeth, "I can do it."

"I can't afford to let you kill yourself because you hesitated." I tell her, looking at her out of the corner of my eye. "I love you and I'm not going to lose you. Not like that. Not ever."

Crystal sighs, "I just keep thinking - maybe they're just sick. Maybe when they find the cure, whoever is looking for it - then we can save everyone. No more loss, nothing. Otis wouldn't have had to die."

"Otis got shot by Shane, he would have died anyways." I say hopelessly, the wound still fresh as I sharply intake some air. "At least that's what I think. An apocalypse gives you a lot of time for conspiracy theories."

Crystal nods absentmindedly, as we pass a barn - we hear a strange hissing.

"What is that?" I ask, eyeing the barn with uncertainty. I walk over to the barn, pressing against the doors. I almost piss myself when the doors push back at me. I hear the angry hissing and growling of.. walkers? It can't be. I peek through the small crack between the doors, and sure enough, I find myself eye to eye with the undead.

"Go to the house." I demand.

Crystal seems confused, "But why-"

"Just go!" I shout, "Get Hershel! Tell him to get out here!" I take cautious steps back from the barn as Crystal darts for the house. The dead seem to taunt me, threatening to break through the chain. "Not today." I repeat, "Not today."

Hershel walks out of the house calmly despite the irate Maggie on his side. Glenn soon joins the two, flanked by Dale as they walk over to me.

"They are sick!" Hershel seems to keep shouting at Dale and Glenn, "They are _family, neighbors, coworkers_. They are all very sick." Hershel walks over to me, "You found them."

Right as he says that, they seem to throw themselves harder against the chain.

"Yeah, I found your little collection you've got going on." I nod at the doors, "They aren't sick Hershel, they're dangerous."

Maggie nods, "One of them attacked me at the pharmacy, Dad. You can't have them in our back yard, so close to us." Maggie swallows hard, "We'd be vulnerable if they broke free. We'd be like rats in a trap."

Hershel runs a hand through his growing gray hair, "It's getting late, we should discuss this in the morning."

"What if we don't have until the morning?" Dale pipes in, "What if they break out tonight?"

Hershel turns to glare at Dale, "In the morning." He reiterates, turning towards the house. "I need to sleep on it. Put guards out if you're that concerned. I will not waste the time." He starts walking towards the house.

* * *

I lay awake, I can still hear the rapid swinging of the barn doors. I can hear the low growls and angry vicious snarls of the animals inside. I roll over on my side to face the window. I see Shane and Andrea posted outside of the barn, their arguing evident in the moon light.

I get up because sleep is a faraway dream. I cannot reach it and it cannot reach me. I pad over to the door, opening it slowly and walking down the stairs. I sit in the kitchen and pour myself a glass of water. The water is warm and it does nothing for my throat.

"Can't sleep?" Damon asks me, setting himself across from me.

"No." I look down at my warm water, "They keep me up." I nod towards the door, beyond that, the barn. "Did you know about them?"

Damon is silent for a few moments before he answers, "Yes, I've known."

"So you've willingly put us all in danger for this long?" I ask, looking up at him, "You let Hershel run with this idea? That they're sick?"

"You know how Hershel is. Once he has his mind set, that's it. Nothing is changing it." Damon leans back in his chair, "Lets talk about Daryl."

"Why? We have monsters in the backyard and you want to talk about Daryl - of all things!" I snarl at him, "Why aren't you taking this seriously? Why aren't you out there guarding?"

Damon purses his lips, "They haven't been a problem before."

I cup my hands around the glass, "Walkers have always been a problem. Caged up or not."

"You're being ridiculous."

"I'm being careful."

"Paranoid."

"I'm surviving, damn it!" I slam my fist against the table, standing up. "How come every conversation we have turns into a fight?"

"Our relationship wasn't that hot before the apocalypse either, little sister." Damon says as an explanation "I'm not sure why we thought that would change." He folds his arms over his chest, "I thought you were better than this."

I glare at him, anger flushing through my veins, "Better than this? What the hell do you mean?"

"You're being reckless, impulsive, a lose cannon." Damon whirls a hand in the air, "Every time I think you have your head screwed on, you turn around and flip me the finger. What happened to you?"

"An apocalypse happened to me!"

"Is that always going to be your excuse?"

"That's the only excuse there is." I stammer, "Well what do you think happened to me? Please enlighten me, big brother. Because you oh-so-obviously know so much more about me than I do! You were there with Crystal and I from the start, right? You were with us at CDC, huh?" I lean over the table to glare at him, "You know nothing." I wave a hand around the kitchen, "You all have been so sheltered from the real world. You have no idea what's out there."

Damon looks down, "I did, for a little while at first. It was brief, just hit a walker with my car - but I kept going. Just rolled right over him." Damon sighs, "I've seen them."

"But you've never had to stab one in the eye, have you?"

His silence is my answer.

"Course' not." I say, pushing myself away from the table, "I'm going to have a cigarette."

* * *

I walk outside, fishing the cigarettes out of my back pocket. I pull them out, staring at them sadly. I'd never been one for smoking before, but now it felt like I was making a bunch of bad decisions, what was one more? I place it delicately between my lips before lighting up. I lean against the side of the house, breathing in the cold misty air with the smoke.

"You gon' share?"

I look over, startled at the sudden appearance of Daryl Dixon. I hand him the cigarette pack and lighter without a word. "Why aren't you sleeping?" I ask, aware he isn't on watch.

"Can't." He mumbles, lighting the cigarette, "What's your excuse?"

I take the cigarette out of my lips, "They keep me up." I nod towards the barn, "Can't sleep with knowing that death is less than a mile away."

"Heard you and your brother fightin'."

"That's all we ever seem to do anymore."

"Appreciate that you have him." Daryl grumbles. I didn't know a lot about Daryl. I knew he lost his brother up on a roof in Atlanta, cuffed like a criminal. Sometimes an apocalypse doesn't change people. They went to find him and boom, he was gone. The only thing left was his hand, still in the cuffs. I didn't know much about Daryl and Merle's relationship though. I knew that Daryl wasn't too happy to find out he was gone. Other than that, I didn't try to pry.

I nod, lifting my cigarette to my lips again, "Yeah." I suddenly turn to him, "How do you know Damon?"

Daryl looks surprised, shocked to see that I was somewhat aware. "I knew him before everything went down. He was friends with Merle." Daryl eyes me, as if he's expecting me to scream at him to stop. "Nothin' but trouble. They just sat and drank all day, him and I got into an argument over some stupid shit - ended up taking a swing at me."

"Wait, so he hates you because you beat the shit out of him while he was drunk?" I ask, unsure if I'm understanding what he's saying.

"How did you know I won?"

"I remember him coming over to my apartment. Raging about some hick that got the better of him while he was drunk. Said when he was sober he was going to give you a piece of his mind." I laugh dryly, remembering the raging lunatic that was my brother storming into my apartment. "Can't believe that was you."

"Believe it, blondie. Your brother is a pretty sucky fighter, sober or not."

I grin, dropping the cigarette and stomping on it. "Yeah, should have seen us during our childhood."

Daryl smiles at me, which makes me feel like I'm going to pass out. Seeing Daryl smile is rare, he's usually angry and brooding, yet then he's this. Just this cocky crazy sexy guy that won't stop staring at me with those damn eyes of his. Did I say crazy sexy? Lets pretend I didn't and move on.

"Made a decision yet?" It looks like it pains him to ask. He knows it bugs me endlessly, but he's dying to know.

"You always get the same answer." I say instead.

"Yeah but I hope it'll change."

"I know you do."

Silence ensues and I shift awkwardly on my feet. "I just keep pissing everyone off and fucking everything up." I nod towards the barn, "Hershel wouldn't be so pissed off if Rick wasn't calling for the heads of his family members. If I hadn't found that barn.."

"Someone else would have stumbled upon it, or the chain would have broke." Daryl lets the ashes fall off the tip of his cigarette. "You did a good thing."

I'm angry and stubborn, still fuming from my fight with Damon. "I know I did, it's just." I blow a piece of hair out of my eyes, "I'm worried. I've been doing that too much."

"Don't worry then." Daryl takes a drag off his cigarette, "Fuck em' all. The only person you outta' be worryin' bout' is you. Just you, no one else. You worry too much and you die, simple as that."

"Is that what you do? You only worry about yourself?"

"Nah, I broke that rule."

"Practice what you preach, Dixon." I say slyly, quirking an eyebrow at him with a grin. I look towards the dark house, "I should try getting some sleep. Going to be rough tomorrow morning." I nod towards the barn, "I'd start packing."

"So should you." I hear softly said before I walk away from him. I climb the steps into the dark sleeping house. I see Damon has abandoned his cup on the table and retreated to his bed room. I pad up the stairs and plop myself in my bed. What the fuck was I going to do?

* * *

Morning came too quickly, I come downstairs to see Hershel sitting at the table, head in his hands. Rick is fiercely talking and everyone is nodding along with each word he says. Hershel shakes his head, not wanting to believe a word.

I swallow hard and wait.


End file.
